Let’s be real—family photos can be stressful, and if you have an autistic child, you might be wondering how in the world you’ll pull it off. I totally get it. As a mom with a neurodivergent kid (and husband!) who has been wary of family photos, I’ve lived through the meltdowns, the resistance, and the sensory overload while I tried to stay smiling and look cute, but still getting her back on track. But here’s the thing—I’ve also spent over a decade as a family photographer working with autistic and sensitive kids, and I know we can make it work! The key is preparation, patience, and a little bit of strategy.

Every child is different, and what works for one won’t necessarily work for another. As the saying goes, “If you’ve met one autistic kid, you’ve met one autistic kid.” But there are some common strategies that can help prepare your autistic child for family photos and make the experience smoother (and even fun!).

1. Choose the Right Kind of Session

It may seem like a short and sweet mini-session is the best option, but autistic kids often do better with longer sessions. They need time to warm up, feel comfortable, and buy into the experience. Plus, a longer session gives us time for breaks, which can be a game-changer for kids who get overstimulated easily. If your child is older, they may tend to count down the minutes of an activity they don’t love, so extra time lets them settle in and realize—hey, this might actually be fun!

2. Communicate with Your Photographer

I always send out a questionnaire that specifically asks about sensitivities, and I encourage you to be as detailed as possible. Your photographer is going to keep this information private, but it’s crucial for making the session successful. Let us know if your child:

Finds eye contact intimidating
Dislikes being touched
Needs movement breaks
Is verbal or non-verbal
Has difficulty following multi-step directions

The more we know, the better we can adapt to prepare your autistic child for family photos in a way that respects their needs. Experienced photographers have lots of tricks up their sleeves for dealing with each scenario in a way that makes parents feel supported and positive about their session, and kids feel respected and included.

3. Adjust Your Expectations

If your kiddo never sits still, don’t expect perfectly posed portraits. If they avoid eye contact, expect natural, interactive shots instead of looking-at-the-camera smiles. If they have a more serious personality, let’s embrace those deep, thoughtful moments. The goal is to capture their true self, not force them into an unrealistic mold.

4. Bring in Their Special Interest

Autistic kids often have big, beautiful passions—whether it’s trains, dinosaurs, or kittens. Let’s use that to our advantage! If your kid loves cats, we can talk about a post-session trip to the pet store to see the adoptable kittens. For older kids, longer-term rewards work well, but younger kids need immediate reinforcement—so have a favorite, non-messy snack on hand to keep things positive.

5. Pick the Right Location

As a family photographer, based in San Francisco and Marin I have tons of locations to fit different needs:

Studio sessions: Best for kids who get easily distracted or need containment for safety issues.
In-home sessions: Great for kids who are overwhelmed by new sights and smells and will warm up to a stranger more easily in-home.
Outdoor sessions: Awesome for kids who thrive on movement. Also, if your child is too focused on their usual home routine and won’t easily disengage with their preferred tasks and toys for a session, a fresh setting might help them engage (but might not work if safety is a concern).

6. Dress for Success

All kids have opinions about clothes, but autistic kids can have strong preferences and sensitivities. Whether they need to wear a specific outfit to feel like themselves or can’t stand seams in their socks, family photos are not the time to experiment. Let them pick their outfit, test it out in advance (right down to socks and underwear), and prioritize comfort over everything.

7. Prep Them for the Experience

All kids like to know what’s coming, but autistic kids thrive on predictability. Before the session:

Tell them where you’re going and how long it will be.
Show them a picture of the location and the photographer.
Explain what will happen (playing games, interacting, and being photographed).
Give them simple instructions (e.g., “Have fun and be yourself!”).

With the right approach, your family photo session can be a positive experience for everyone. I’m here to help prepare your autistic child for family photos in a way that makes them feel comfortable, safe, and seen.

If you still have concerns or have questions, please reach out to me directly here. If you are ready to book, you can do that below!

P.S. I used behind the scenes photos of myself for this post because I always want to respect all children’s right to privacy and right to choose for themselves how and when their stories are told. The families in these photos do not necessarily have autistic kids in their family but I thought including them might help your child see me in my element! If you’d like to see my work, which includes many families with autistic children, you can do that using the header links to see each category.

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How to Prepare Your Autistic Child for Family Photos